2011

The run down on 2011....if I can even remember any of it!

January!!

What is not to love about January! Beginning of the year! All is new. Brecken turned 2 this last January:) This is when our doctors started getting serious in knowing something was up with Brecken. We started off the year with a ton of different doctors. First here was the ENT since they had thought his drooling could be a sign that there was blockage. Come to find out all looks good. No blockage.

February:)

LOVE!! First Valentines Day Doug has been in the same country in years!! Still nothing on Brecken. They have given him meds to see if it helps clear him up however his doctor thinks there is more so she refers us to a developmental specialist. Brecken had an amazing doctor who really listened and knew we needed more help. I really loved her:) I also have my surgery done:) I feel great and I am happy I can concentrate on what Brecken needs from me instead of my health issues.

March

Brecken has been diagnosed with Hypotonia which gets him into physical therapy. Now we go to find out what is causing his Hypotonia. His Occupational Therapist tells us he has abnormal range of motion, muscle strength and tone, posture, gait and balance. He gets AFOs (leg braces) that help stabilize him and he LOVES them!! They really help. After the appointment he gets a really bad fever and I cannot get it to come down so I take him in and his doctor gets a blood test and keeps him in the clinic where she can keep an eye on him. She would send him to the hospital but being that she knows so much about his case anyways she would really rather keep him close until she figures some stuff out. Did I mention I really like his doctor? She also wants a urine sample but all comes back clean. She gives him a shot and keeps him there a little longer....then we can go home.

April

We take Brecken in to get his hearing tested. He has conductive hearing loss but it clears up due to a cold. We meet Dr. Cooper (developmental specialist) and she orders tests. She agrees something is wrong. She comments that it may be a degenerative muscle disorder and orders an EKG, EEG, MRI and xrays. This scares us because this will mess with Breckens life expectancy and he would have a weak heart. This scares me.....a lot. I cannot lose my son.

May

May is a birthday month in our family. Taylor turned 5 on the 15th, I turned....20 something on the 17th and my mom turned like 30 on the 19th. We like May. We get Brecken in for his last test which is the MRI. They have to put him to sleep to do it and I sit and hold his hand while the machine takes an hour to take different pictures of his brain. Then I hold him until he wakes up a couple hours later. This test I am not worried about. I am more worried about the xrays and EEG. Nothing is wrong with his brain....right? Breckens doctor calls and she wants us to come in to discuss the results. May 16th we go in to sit and discuss what we fear will be a parents worse nightmare. Dr. Cooper tells us the EEG and EKG look great! HUGE sigh of relief!! His xrays look good however she informs us he will have to have hip xrays once a year from now on. We look at her confused and she tells us the MRI came back with something. WHAT?!?! That was the one thing I was sure would be clean. She starts in telling us that there is a severe thinning of the anterior portion of Breckens Corpus Callosum. Yeah....what? He has bilateral frontal lobe abnormalities due to an old hemorrhagic phenomenon that is calcified which means it happened in my second trimester of being pregnant with him. Okay doc...english? I had a blood clot that went through my placenta and ruptured in Breckens brain that caused his brain to stop growing in that area. This is called Peri-ventricular Leukimalacia. This is in the part of the brain that works on his muscle tone and for him to cross information from one side of the brain to the other. This is what has caused our son to be diagnosed with Diplegic Cerebral Palsy. Diplegic Cerebral Palsy. Diplegic Cerebral Palsy. I repeat these words in my head over and over and over. I have a son who has been diagnosed with Diplegic Cerebral Palsy. I did not see this one coming. He will need Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy and Speech Therapy. I am doing really well up to this point. I keep thinking in my head I have to wait to get out of here before I cry. My kids need to know we are okay......then she hands me a form to get a handicap tag for our cars. This is where I have to bite my cheek to keep from losing it. She explains he is not helpless....he just needs help to get up to where he should be. He is strong and he can do this. He just needs us to get him the help he needs....to push him. He needs strong parents. I get all the way home and through the day without crying. I put my kids to bed, kiss them and pray with them and tell them how much I love them. I kiss Brecken extra in knowing he will only get stronger instead of weaker and thank God for letting us keep him and that he will be okay. I go in my room, close the door and completely fall apart. I remember what Dr. Cooper told me about the fact that with that blood clot, I should have lost him. In knowing I lost our second baby and now had this happen she tells me I need to go in and get tested. I also had bleeding with Bailey so she really would like me to get this done. I just cannot stop thanking God for not taking him away from me but I cannot help but have a feeling that this was all my fault and I did something wrong. My body did this to his and he has to deal with it. The next day is my birthday....not how I thought my birthday would go this year but I have my family....I have my son. We all go to Disneyworld to help get our family back on track of being a family and not so much on what is going on with Brecken. We obviously have a blast:)

June

Brecken has already been in therapies for his Hypotonia so we have a pretty good head start on all of this! I love his therapists and I am staying up day and night to learn sign language so this poor boy can tell me what is going on! He picks it up fast and just like when he got his leg braces the signing makes him light up in knowing he can finally communicate! Doug gets slotted to go to a school for his new MOS and we are getting ready to move to Colorado.

July

We say goodbye to all of our friends and start our very long drive with 3 kids and 2 dogs to Denver. We make it in 3 days:) I get Brecken all set up in his therapies and register Taylor for soccer and school. Now to relax until Doug leaves. We did get the kids in some swim lessons to pass the time and they loved it!! We also have our 10 year high school reunion! Very fun:)

August

Doug is in AZ and thankfully school has started for Taylor. She also has started her soccer and life is going well. My little Bailey bug turns the big 1!! Cannot believe she is already 1!

September

Doug comes back for a long weekend. We are in our groove and things are moving along. September is my favorite month of the year. The smells and the colors of fall starting. Plus Colorado is gorgeous this time of year. We are told by Breckens therapists that he will need a wheelchair. Not for everyday use but just for long walks. They also tell us they may require him to have one in school in case of fire drill or something since he cannot walk fast and he will be too big to carry. We order it and insurance pays 100%! Huge blessing!!

October

Doug makes another weekend back to Colorado and then we are getting ready for HALLOWEEN!! I have Cinderella, Spiderman and a little cow. Super cute and had a lot of fun!

November

The year is coming to an end and so is our time in Colorado. Brecken receives his wheelchair which is great but seeing him in it almost breaks me. Although knowing it is not needed most of the time just knowing we have a tiny chair for our son makes it hard. FYI Brecken almost walked the ENTIRE time trick or treating! I only carried him the last 30 minutes:) Doug comes home twice this month and we spend Thanksgiving with our families:) I am starting to feel the anticipation of moving to a whole new state and starting all over again. Brecken is doing awesome in his therapies and he was evaluated to get a machine to speak for him and they inform us for the 3rd time that we do need this machine (we got 3 opinions on this for the fact that we were okay with sign language and we were having a hard time accepting that a machine would talk for our son). At this last evaluation they told us that he needed to be able to communicate with others that did not know sign language. So we agree and decide to get the machine. Insurance covers this 100% also. Thank you Tricare! I am still having a hard time with this whole thing and decide running is my outlet....I run....a lot.

December

Well Doug gets home for good this month! We get the speaking device for Brecken and pack up our 3 kids and 2 dogs and now 2 cars and head for California!! I am excited!! I am nervous!! We get to California the next day and get our boarding house. We celebrate the birth of our Savior Jesus Christ and give thanks that we are back to being a family and that all is well in our lives! We bring in the New Year knowing we have a lot to look forward to in 2012.

2012

We get our house on post in a couple days:) We have an ocean view from the living room window. We are excited to finally get our stuff and be in our own place next week! Taylor is excited to start school and dance next week!! Brecken is doing great and even saying some words!! He will be 3 in 2 days. He has come so far with the help of so many people. I am so proud of him but I will get mushy on him in a blog on Thursday:) He starts school next week too. Since he has a handicap they start kids at 3 instead of 5 through the school system. I am very excited for him! He should start his therapies soon too! Bailey is just being Bailey. Growing like a weed and walking all over the place. She has a lot planned I am sure for this year which scares me a little. Lol. As for Doug and I we are just enjoying what we have and feeling blessed. It was a rough year for us and we were tested a lot but we pulled through as husband and wife and as a mom and dad. We are stronger now:) Our plans for this year are maybe adding another little one:) We would love to give Brecken a little brother. We will see if God agrees with our plans. He knows what is best for us and has pulled us through and we would be nothing without Him. We give Him all the praise and glory for this past year and pray He blesses this next year:) I pray He blesses all of you too:) Happy New Year and God bless!!!