Well this year has been full of fun and not so fun. To start off I got pregnant and was sicker then a dog New Years Eve last year. I was throwing up at midnight and not for the same reasons as others. Then Doug deployed again a week after Breckens birthday. Being pregnant with 2 kids and a husband deployed was not that fun. Especially since Brecken was so far behind and was doing the things a 6 month old could do. He actually just started rolling on his first birthday. Anyways it was a fun 6 months of therapy (speech, physical and occupational) for Brecken and with Taylor in dance and school, that was the hardest pregnancy of my life. Plus with the scares we had with Bailey...not so fun. However I did have a lot of help from family and friends. My mom actually flew out when I went in bleeding with Bailey (this scared us since we had lost our 2nd child in a miscarriage) and she was here for 3 weeks and I just remember it being the best 3 weeks I think I have ever had with her. We did not kill each other and I was pretty upset to see her go. I got through my pregnancy and Doug came home a couple weeks before he was supposed to because of another complication with Bailey. He made it a couple weeks before I had her. Then my mom came back out to help with kiddos and my mother in law was here to help after my c-section. I am so incredibly blessed with my moms!! They are always there when I need them! So this is when allllll the good started!
Bailey Ryan Levy was born August 9! She was my most favorite part of this last year. She is beautiful and getting so big already!! She is almost 5 months and has started rolling already. She cracks up at daddy and just thinks she is the funniest thing ever (she will play around when feeding which she thinks is hilarious but makes a mess).
Brecken is just getting into his 2s which is so up and down for him. He is wonderful and super cute some days but man there are days he is so stubborn and willful! That boy reminds me of me so much!! I am excited for his birthday next week. He is out of all therapy except speech. He is all boy but I am LOVING having a boy in the mix!!
Taylor is a kid now instead of my toddler. She is getting very tall like daddy and is incredibly smart however this comes with massive curiosity and a lot of questions. She is my saving grace. God knew what He was doing when He gave me that girl first. She is just a rock and surprisingly I find myself trying to be more like her. She is just so giving and kind. She gets mommy through all those tough deployments :)
Doug is still waiting on word for his MOS change. We are hoping to be moving soon over closer to family.
This year was amazing in learning for me about myself. I found that I enjoy couponing a lot!! I save us some moola!! I also am educating myself on health and we are really trying to change our eating habits and live a healthier lifestyle. Brecken is loving it but Taylor is fighting us a little. I have to keep reminding her that mommy did not get the skinny genes like she did. Lol. So far though I am feeling incredible! I am down 10 pounds already!!
I have also had incredible influences on my life this year. I have become very good friends with the other leaders from the mommies group we lead and I do not think I have ever had girls show me as much love as they have. I am constantly finding myself trying to learn from them in so many ways and I love them so much. It will really make me sad to leave them since I have never really had friends that were girls like them. They showed me that it is okay to love and be loved and that I am worth it. I am still working on it because I have never had people care about me like they have. I love you Cherry, Lisa, Jessica and Alison!! You guys are teaching me a lot and I am still a work in progress but you guys are great mentors for me to look up to!!
As you all know my dad passed unexpectedly last year and I have been in kind of a shock and not really knowing how to feel about it all since our relationship was rocky. I felt horribly guilty because when I found out, I felt a little relieved that I did not have to go through anymore of it. I did not have to try so hard or deal with his drinking or decide if I was gong to allow my kids around him. This last couple weeks I find myself missing him more then ever. I feel like it took a whole year to feel anything and now it is hitting me like a ton of bricks. I am not sure why it took so long but my heart aches for him a lot. I have dreams about him all the time and it just makes me miss him more. We did not have a perfect relationship but we were trying. He was really trying to be a dad even though some of the bad still seeped in but he was trying and I have realized many things I could have done differently to try and help.
So that is my year in a nutshell!! I am EXTREMELY excited for 2011 because we have a lot of life changing things coming up that I will talk about when I am more comfortable about them!! No I am not pregnant....lol....yet :)
Happy New Year!!!
